30 Minutes or Less — Cassette

Track List

Description

People of Earth! Have no fear. I am Pizza Bear of New Bear City. I come in peace…and in 30 minutes or less, or it’s free! I am here to tell you my story, just one in a city of millions, in a Universe of trillions. At a young age, I was orphaned when my parents died in a car crash. A semi-truck filled with marmalade t-boned a truck full of honey, and the rest was crystallized. The courts deemed my Uncle, a degenerate gambler with a heart of gold, as the only bear fit to watch over me. I loved my Uncle. He used to take me to the crab races and taught me how to play three-card grizzly. But, in the City that never hibernates, it’s not enough to just hustle; you have to beg, borrow, and steal. Which also happened to be the name of the pawn…